Austin Scholar #164: How finding purpose helps solve mental health crises
& advice from a Stanford freshman
Hey, y'all!
This week from Austin Scholar...
How finding purpose helps solve mental health crises
Austin’s Anecdote: Advice from a Stanford freshman
Scholar’s Sources: What I’ve been thinking about…
First midterm of spring quarter completed! It was multivariable integration, and I’m super happy with how I did. As my CS106A (also known as “intro to CS”) midterm is coming up, I have to keep reminding myself that multivariable integration is a lot harder than basic Python and that I should be able to do well on this exam. So I’ve been studying a lot for that – along with my second math midterm that’s next Thursday. Midterm season at Stanford pretty much never ends.
I’ve also been going on a lot of “plates” (short for “platonic dates”) with the Pi Phi (my new sorority!) girls, which I love. Not only am I meeting some incredible people, but I’m also getting a ton of advice for my sophomore year. Spring quarter might have a reputation for being the “fun”, “chill” quarter, but it’s definitely my busiest quarter yet.
How finding purpose helps solve mental health crises
Middle and high school aren’t just tough – they can also be overwhelming for your kid. Between academic pressure, social stress, and a steady stream of world problems on their phones, it’s no wonder so many teens struggle with anxiety, sadness, and self-doubt.
But here’s a truth we don’t talk about enough: one of the best ways for kids to find purpose and heal is to step outside themselves and heal others.
It’s natural, when your child feels down, to want to comfort them, give advice, or even just let them ride out their feelings. But too much time spent “wallowing” or being trapped in their own head can make things worse. Research and real-world experience show that turning outward is often the key to feeling better.
Research also tells us:
Action breaks the cycle. When teens focus on others’ needs, they interrupt the downward spiral of rumination and negative self-talk.
Contribution creates meaning. Teens who help others discover their life has value far beyond grades or social status—they’re needed, and they matter.
Empathy is a superpower. Supporting friends, classmates, or community members builds emotional intelligence and resilience.
Have you ever noticed that when you're going through something hard (like a tough situation with a friend or a breakup), it's somehow comforting to help a friend with their problems for a while? It distracts you from your own problems, but it also makes you feel valuable and in control of something, instead of being stuck wallowing in your own challenges.
You don’t have to wait for the “perfect moment” or the right mood to be useful – sometimes, the act of helping is what helps your mental state start to change. Here’s how to encourage your teen to look outward:
1. Spot the signs and offer a gentle push
If your child seems withdrawn, irritable, or stuck in a loop of negative thinking, don’t just tell them to “cheer up.” Instead, suggest a concrete way to help someone else:
"Your aunt has been working extra hours this week and is exhausted. Do you want to help me make dinner to take over so she can have a break?"
“I’m going to write letters and donate toys to children in the hospital. Would you like to help?”
2. Frame helping as a privilege, not a chore
Teens are motivated when they know their efforts matter. Talk about volunteering or acts of kindness as opportunities:
“You have a real gift for making younger kids feel welcome. Would you consider being a peer mentor?”
“Your tech skills could really help the community center with their website.”
3. Start small, but start
If your teen is feeling low, huge commitments can feel overwhelming. Begin with bite-sized acts:
Write a note of encouragement to a friend
Collect gently-used clothes for donation
Offer to tutor a struggling classmate
Make soup for a sick family member or friend
Make cookies for their classroom
Complement people's outfits when they're out and about
Pay it forward at Starbucks
Invite someone shy to sit at lunch
Leave encouraging sticky notes on bathroom stall doors
Do a small act of service for a family member
Hold the door for anyone you can
The magic is real: when kids start focusing on others, something shifts inside them:
Their mood improves. Acts of kindness release feel-good brain chemicals—science backs this up!
Their perspective widens. Teens see they’re not alone in their struggles, which reduces feelings of isolation.
Their self-worth grows. Making a difference, even in small ways, reminds kids that their actions count.
As a parent, your involvement matters. Teens might act like they don’t want you around, but modeling service and empathy has a powerful impact. Volunteer together, talk about the “why” behind helping, and celebrate their contributions (not just their achievements).
If your child resists, try to make acts of service a family event. Plan monthly service projects or kindness challenges for you all to do together.
Life gets richer – and mental health gets stronger – when we stop looking inward and start reaching outward. Encourage your teen to get involved, help others, and watch as their sense of purpose and joy grows. Don’t let them get stuck in sadness. Instead, help them discover the meaning and connection that comes from being part of something bigger.
One incredible example of how far you can take this is the inspiring Alpha High student Alex Mathew (y’all should look at his LinkedIn – it’s insane), who created Berry (I’m obsessed with the website he built).
Berry is an AI-powered plushie designed to support teens through one of the most emotionally volatile stages of life—not with lectures or generic affirmations, but with real, personalized, daily guidance.
Teens talk to Berry for just five minutes each day about whatever’s on their mind: stress about a test, a fight with a friend, or a feeling they can’t name. In response, Berry speaks back with empathy and clarity, offering tailored advice that’s rooted in who they are and what they need right now.
After each conversation, Berry texts a bite-sized action step—something simple but meaningful—and follows up to ensure follow-through. Over time, those micro-wins compound. Teens start feeling more seen, more in control, more emotionally equipped.
Alex has already done so much work with Berry.
He has:
Built the proof of concept scrappy prototype (please watch this video – it is so impressive)
Spoken at Web Summit about Berry, one of the biggest tech conferences in the world
Gotten validation from huge stakeholders in AI and mental health professionals (Snap, Born This Way Foundation, Sahil Bloom, FOSI, etc.)
Gotten over $30k in non-dilutive funding
Worked with developers/designers to build an app wireframe
Landed a partnership with an influencer, @sloanealex_ (2 million followers on TikTok and another Alpha High student)
That last one is the most important (at least in the context of this article). Alex has been working to expand this program with other teen influencers – so they can use their platform to get Berry to as many people and impact as many kids’ lives as possible.
This story is so important because it illustrates how far you can go helping others. Alex is spending his time creating a tool that supports people's mental health. He's building an impressive product, but more importantly, he's building his own mental health by being helpful to other people.
Austin’s Anecdote: Advice from a Stanford freshman
Back with some more advice from my Stanford friends! This week, you’ll hear from Sarah Mian, someone who also spent their time in high school working to improve the educational experience and outcomes of the people around her. Here’s what she has to say about getting into Stanford: